Do Not! Do Too!
by omfgwtflmao
Summary: Marauders passing notes during a very boring lesson. RLSB. SLASH. ONESHOT. Don't Like? Don't read!
1. The Actual Story

**Characters belong to JK Rowling.**

* * *

J: Paddy, lets pass notes. This lesson is fantastically boring.

S: Agreed. Hmm...what to talk about...

J: You and Emily still dating?

S: Nah. Finished with her last week. Boring as hell.

J: Really? She was gorgeous though. Lovely blonde hair.

S: I'm not to keen on blondes.

J: Well, who's going to be your next victim?

S: ...I don't know.

J: How about Gemma McFein?

S: No. She's too stupid. I doubt she could tell you that two plus two equals four.

J: I guess you're right. How about...Lisa Dodd?

S: Black hair.

J: I have black hair. YOU have black hair. What's wrong with black hair?

S: It's not brown? I don't know. I prefer brown hair. It's cute.

J: Okay...so...Abbey Tin? She has brown hair and a cute face.

S: Too curvy. I like 'em thin.

J: What? Curvy is good. Girls look like men when they don't have curves.

S: And? I don't really care.

J: ...

S: James?

J: Are you gay?

S: What..umm...don't be ridiculous.

J: YOU ARE!

S: Don't you dare tell anyone, James Potter, or I will castrate you.

J: ...I won't say a word. So...you really are...? Who do you fancy then?

S: No one. And yes. I am really gay.

J: No one? That's bull. Complete, utter bull. Well, I already know you like your men with brown hair. How many guys have brown hair though?

S: Lots.

J: Exactly. Now. Describe your perfect man please.

S: This is so stupid.

J: No, it's not. Describe.

S: Okay, okay. Brown hair, golden eyes, slim but muscular, smart, sweet, sensitive...

J: Merlin. You're in love with Moony. MOONY! What the hell, Sirius.

S: I didn't say that. I just described.

J: You described all right. You described Moony. _Moony_.

S: Did not.

J: Did too.

S: Did not.

J: Did too.

S: Did not.

J: Did not.

S: Did too.

J: HA! So you admit it!

S: Wait...damn it! So I did. Fine. I like Moony. Is that so wrong?

J: No. I actually think it's pretty cute.

S: I'm mildly offended by the use of the word 'cute'. Sirius Black isn't cute. He's sexy, gorgeous and handsome, as is my dear Remmy.

J: Remmy?

S: ...Shut up.

J: You love him...

S: ...

J: Sirius and Remus sitting in a tree...

S: Hush.

J: Doing things they shouldn't be...

S: Nooo...

J: It's starts with 'S'...

S: I hate you. Just so you know.

J: It ends in 'X'...

S: Die. DIE! Why won't you die?

J: Oh my gosh, they're having sex!

R: Who's having sex? And why are you passing notes? You should be paying attention.

J: You and Sirius are having sex.

R: No we're not. Sirius, are we having sex?

S: Apparently.

R: Hmm...I never noticed.

J: It's because Sirius has a small penis.

S: Do not!

J: Do too!

S: Do not!

J: Do too!

S: Do not!

J: Do not!

S: Do too!

J: HA! You admit to this as well.

S: I hate you.

R: SIRIUS HAS A SMALL PENIS!

S: I'm not your friend any more Remus.

J: He wants to do you.

S: So what if I do?

R: ...I'm still here you know.

S: Remmy, James is being mean.

J: He loves you! He wants to hug you, he wants to kiss you, he wants to...

R: STOP! No he doesn't. Tell him Sirius.

S: ...

R: Sirius?

S: You're hot when you blush.

R: Umm...thanks? Does this mean that you do love me?

S: Maybe...

R: Tell me?

S: Okay, yes. But don't hate me. Don't get mad. I can't help it that you're such a sexy little werewolf.

R: Hmm...Want to skip this lesson and make out some where?

S: Sounds good to me!

J: Fine! Leave me all alone!

P: I'm here!

J: All alone...all alone in the world...

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**What do you think? Funny? Stupid? Good? Terrible?**

**Tell me in a review!**

**Love.**

**x**


	2. Reviews Reply

**Wow. I got twenty reviews in about a day. I have never gotten that many reviews. Ever. So I'm going to say thank you to all you kind people. Remember, I love you! I'm rather overwhelmed. I sort of over-do the exclamation points while replying to reviews. I have two very valid explanations why. 1. I love reviews and am utterly excited about all your wonderful comments. 2. Panic at the Disco lost their '!' (I stole it, but don't tell anyone because it's a secret) so I thought I might as well use it as much as possible. Any way, on with the review replies. (Ooh, look at that. Alliteration!) **

**deathtodiscotexasliberalweirdo:** Yeah, I know it lacks in the literary department. I guess that was sort of on purpose as it was supposed to be note passing. I'm glad you thought it was funny. I wasn't too sure I had a single funny bone in me!

**Magical Singer Gal:** Thank you for the complements!

**F.Valconbridge:** Thank you!I tend to get a little random sometimes. Must be all the sugar.

**Mademoiselle Fantome:** Hahaaa. I'm glad I made you laugh. Thank you for your review!

**DeluxxxxInu:** I wasn't too sure whether or not to put the last three lines in, but since you liked them, I'm glad I did.

**MarieEsmeraldaDumbledore-Black:** Giggling is fun! Woo!

**MinervaEvenstar:** I always imagined James to my this fun loving tease, you know? Yeah. Remus totally wants it hehe.

**TheCresentMoonWriter:** WOW! I love you. Thank you so much.

**xuncannyx:** Yeah, Remus was rather out of character. I guess I had to make him that way so that the fic would be funny...yeah. Hahaa. Thanks for reviewing!

**The Shadow's Murderer: **Thank you!

**Bottlebrush:** Peter always gets mistreated in fan fiction. I feel sorry for him, since he did turn out to be (rather) good in the end. I just can't forgive him for betraying James and Lily. The evil/good sod.

**lemmesee:** The tree song? It's engraved in my mind! All the children used to sing it. The dirty things! I also have one about a bush: "Remus and Sirius sitting in a bush, trying to have a baby, push, push, push". The things kids come up with. Terrible. Teehee.

**CeliaLauna:** Wow! Glad you liked my Remus. Thanks!

**headbangingtogreenday:** Wow, thank you. I have another note story, called 'The Note'. Check it out if you have time.

**Littlekaylamarie:** The funniest ever? And I have your love? Oh wow. I feel so special! Thank you so much.

**xxkristeen: **My one-shot is loved. Have a cookie! COOKIES FOR ALL!

**dristi:** Yay for cute- and funnyness! Your review is appreciated very much!

**riseofafallenangel:** James being immature love.

**Skieyt:** My story has no Flaws? That's a first. I usually have about a million typos (Well, maybe not that many!)

**Orb: **I was contemplating whether or not to finish it like that, however, if you think it's funny, I'm glad I did.


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